In my free time I knit sweaters, and by knit I mean kick, and by sweaters I mean babies.

eah once again i cannot sleep for the life of me i think i m developing a stronger case of insomnia, for the past three days i cant sleep until around 3 in the morning. so i've decided to put all of my thoughts down into a blog and see if that helps so you may read through this because its all ging to be abunch of random thoughts. so here i go.

yeah frifay is my 18th birthday im legal then im having a party and most of my friends are invited. but what really goes through my mind is how much hard times my friends have been getting at i mean the beginning of the year we all were really close but now most of use are sperating due to different views of each other and mind set. it makes me sad to see this. another thing that keeps going through my mind is my computer its about to crap out on me the video sucks my monitor is dieing and my cpu fan doesnt even work and its a mini tower and i leave it on all the time while im home it hasnt been turned off all week. yeah and so i want to make a compy with the bday money that i get im thinking that ill have enough to get my tower motherboard and amd hopefully. also the other day when i was walking jessica out of my house she stoped to talk to my mother and she was on the computer and i looked at her screen and she had her explorer minimized and i saw that it said dell online store well i was hopeing that they might be getting me a new compy or a laptop witch i've been asking them for, for the past few years. another thing that is running through my mind is will i be able to get into the airforce and become an EOD (explosive ordanice disposal) in other words i get to make things go boom.but the airforce will own me for 4 yrs and longer so that kinda leaves me with out a life..but what can i say what life. hell i cant even get a date for fucks sake. i want to go into it honestly i may not be the most patriotic or willing to fuck up my life for my country which is going to hell in a hand basket. the reason is it will make me into what i want it will keep me out of harms way well except for the bombs and it will keep me educated and i can travel and get out of this sess pool of a town.  another thing that runs through is i wish finding someone was as easy as them saying you me movie friday bitch! someone that i can enjoy life with i mean i still like jessica shes alway fun to be around and she has an innocence to the world(even though i know she isnt innocent) but yeah i still like her and i know that she doesnt and i can accept that and so i will keep my options open for others. of course not a whole lot of people want to be around me because they really dont know how i react and who i really am but the ones who do damn they enjoy being around me and damn i love them all for sticking with me. honestly i want to dissapeir for a while but i cant so i have to deal with it. one thing that i hate about myspace is that people whore themselves out i want to keep my friends my actual friends i dont want people who dont even know me or fucking tom hell i dont even know him for all i know hes a child porn star fuck im glad that hes your friend at the beggining but hell if i want to delete you as a friend i better damn well please. yeah sometimes i really hate my body im fat pudgy tubby chub-a-lub i have MOOBS of fucks sake no man should have boobs. i think that one of the reasons anyone will give me a chance.  there is over 6.5 billion 51% is female and i am one man and they say that theres someone for everyone well what about the people who've had multiple partners...STOP FUCKING TAKEING THEM LEAVE SOME FOR US POOR PEOPLE WHO CANT GET A DATE BECAUSE YOU TAKE THEM ALL AWAY YOU FUCKTARDS!!!! yeah i know that was pointless im bored and still not really tired yeah yesterday..sunday? yeah sunday i went to bed at 3 in the morning and i woke up at 7 somthing and you'd figure that id be able to sleep like a log tonight well i cant and thats fucking weird. what was also weird was that for no apperent reason i was happy i mean really happy like just found some one won something got an A+ in a college class that you've been failing for all the other terms happy. but now i've lost it eh i guess it was a once in a lifetime moment. ... idk
yeah yesterday i was working on my homework and my sister called and she asked me to mess with her myspace. idid. meh thats what all good brothers are for...now the funny part is that most of my friends didn't even know i had a sister til i told them. fucking nubbins. you know that most of the emoticons are the same its so stupid. i mean get rid of the fucking extras.
http://www.xoxide.com/aerocool-aeroengine-2-black.html
yeah thats the case i want to get.
http://www.newegg.com/Product/Product.asp?Item=N82E16813131517
my motherboard
ok nvm i just found out that thats really all that i can afford..sonavabitch
that sucks cuz i wanted to get those three cuz then i can at least run some of it.
oh well what ever well now i think i will goto sleep or atleast try.

oh yeah one thing im not a fucking nazi they just have cool symbols.
oh yeah im a neo marxist....well somewhat my ideas are changed in some whys.

good morning to you all

*nick*